Caterpillar Unveils Next-Gen Dozer That Practically Operates Itself, Still Needs a Human for Some Reason

The Mighty D8. Dozing like it just don't care.

DEERFIELD, IL — In a move to eliminate any remaining shred of human dignity from the art of bulldozing, Caterpillar Inc. proudly unveiled the next-generation Cat D8 Dozer this week, a machine so advanced it may eventually just write its own press releases.

The D8’s designers, clearly driven by a deep passion for creating the ultimate earth-mover, claim the new model is “packed with advanced technology.” This includes operator assist features so robust they may soon ask you to scoot over and let the machine handle it.

The D8 Cabin or a luxurious man cave, you choose.

Next Gen Dozer-Cab Redesign: Like First-Class, But Dirtier

The completely redesigned cab is bigger and fancier than your first apartment, boasting a wide air suspension seat and 17% better visibility—because the only thing holding back bulldozing productivity was apparently not being able to see slightly more dirt. For the operator’s convenience, the cab can also be removed in just 30 minutes, allowing for service access or perhaps for those moments when your bulldozer needs some “me time.”

Inside, a 10-inch touchscreen display offers real-time performance tips, or as we call it, a subtle way for your bulldozer to nag you about how you’re doing your job wrong. HVAC vents are strategically placed to keep windows clear and morale tepid.

Technology to Make You Feel Replaceable

With features like Stable Blade, Steer Assist, and Traction Control, Caterpillar ensures the D8 can do most of the thinking for you. AutoRip and Blade Load Monitor are just a few of the tools that allow operators to focus on more critical tasks, like debating if their job title should now include the word “assistant.”

Even the waste handler model gets a glow-up with impact-resistant cab doors and lights mounted higher “to protect from debris.” Because apparently, nothing screams "state-of-the-art" like headlights that are less likely to be smashed by trash.

Remote Operation: Bulldozing From Your Couch

For those looking to bulldoze from a safe distance—or simply avoid walking to the cab—the D8 is remote-operation ready. Operators can control the dozer from up to 1,312 feet away with a console so sleek it might as well come with a recliner and popcorn. For more dedicated control freaks, a fully immersive Command Station lets you operate the machine “miles away,” perfect for flattening dirt while simultaneously binge-watching your favorite show.

Machine Connectivity: The Dozer That Snitches on You

Thanks to features like Remote Troubleshoot and VisionLink, Caterpillar’s D8 does more than move earth; it also tracks your every move. From miles traveled to idle time, the dozer keeps detailed records and transmits them back to HQ. It’s unclear whether this data collection is for improving efficiency or just so the dozer can flex on lesser machinery.

The Future of Bulldozing or the End of It?

While the D8 is undoubtedly a marvel of engineering, some skeptics wonder if there’s still a need for human operators at all. “With all these features, I’m starting to think my job title is ‘bulldozer babysitter,’” said one operator who wished to remain anonymous.

For more information—or to ask the D8 when it plans to file for independence—visit cat.com.